LoNG dAys...build character???? I DON'T think so!!!

Can I just vent for a minute?! (Guess its my blog and I can do what I want right?!) Its been "A LONG DAY"...I will just leave it at that...(not going to dive into any details or even share much BUT..). My heart is heavy, my mind is full and some days, I just DO to be DOING, so I don't have to think about anything. This morning was especially difficult for me....I debated on what I wanted to accomplish today and after my workout I decided that... I needed to get out. I had some things that I had to pick up at Walmart so today seemed like THE day to do it. I showered, got ready and jumped in the car....started driving and listening to the radio. Every song that came on seemed to choke me up , if it wasn't for one thing- it was another. Finally after 3o minutes of it I just started crying...there goes my make-up all down my face. SO I put a stop to the tunes and decided that I needed quiet time....that wasn't what I needed either, because then I just had thinking time, AND that WAS the LAST thing that I needed to do today! Finally I arrive at Walmart. I pull myself together, touch up the make up on my face and march in like I knew where I was going. I was hoping that I didn't run in to anyone that I knew today. NOT that I don't love all my friends and acquaintances because I do, they are the best ever...I just didn't want anyone to ask me "how I was today" (only because I KNEW that my emotions were on the sleeve of my shirt and would fall off at any minute). I wandered around the store for awhile, looking at this and that....even got a few Christmas ideas. I gathered up what I needed and then browsed a bit more. I didn't want to go home very bad and so I continued to wander. Just when I thought I was pulling myself together I walked past the end of an isle that had the cutest (little baby) Halloween costumes on it. They were all for 0-3 months old babies. There was a little pea (sweet pea), a Zebra, a giraffe and a little piggy....I just lost it, I started to cry! GOSH- I was supposed to be buying little Halloween outfits for my grandbaby to be wearing this month.... I was supposed to be waiting for my kids to send me pictures over the Internet, of him "all dressed up for grandma to see"....I was supposed to be getting ready to spoil him at Christmas, I already knew what I wanted to get him....I was supposed to be waiting for pictures of his first smile and looking forward to the many years that I was going to have with him, loving the cute little guy....I WAS SUPPOSED to be a grandma right now!! AND frankly...it still hurts like crazy!...I know eventually I will be a grandma. I have no doubts that it will happen. I know that the Lord has a plan for everyone and that my sweet daughter and sweet son-in-law will have babies of their own. I know that the Lord is blessing their lives as we speak, in the ways that only HE does. He loves them more than I do and HE will bless them. I also know that I have many children and eventually will have grandbabies running around my feet. But right now, I am still grieving for the grandbaby that we planned on having right now, today, the one that was supposed to be wrapped in the little red puppy blanket that I made just for him... Wearing the outfit that I bought just for him, with his first basketball sneakers...that's the way it was SUPPOSED TO BE...grief was just one of the emotions that got the best of me today. I had to leave the area because people were starting to stare and that's the last thing I wanted today was to draw attention to myself (I don't ever want that, but especially not today). I continued my journey through Walmart, trying to avoid any more "baby surprises". I finished up and headed to the front to check out. With all the flu that is out and about, I decided I was going to lean on the side of cautious and sort of check out all the checkers...see if any looked ill or worn down. I finally picked the one that I thought looked the healthiest (sounds like I was picking a hog for slaughter...). I proceeded to unload my cart and put everything on the belt and waited for her to start to scan my findings. JUST as she finished with the customer in front of me, she took out her till (I'm thinking WHAT THE HECK??) and said that she was heading home, her day was over (well okay, I thought...go home.) THEN who comes to take her place BUT the most sickly checker of the bunch. She is hacking up a lung, looks feverish and then "...excuses herself if she doesn't talk much, she has the FLU!!!!!!!!!!!!!"....I wanted to die! I know that my eyes flew open and my chin hit the floor. I couldn't believe it!!!! If she hadn't already touched my stuff and started scanning it through-I really might have loaded it all up and taken it to another register. BUT...instead, I sat there and watched her hack and cough as she put my things into bags. She tells me about "how sick she has been, can't sleep at night, has to sit up all night because she is coughing so much!!!!" I just literally wanted to slap this woman and send her home! WHAT business does she have coming to work and contaminating everyone else??? Doesn't she know that's how things spread????....UHGGGGGGGGGG. I wasn't very nice...I didn't say anything and was very short with her. I didn't want to yell and tell her what I really thought, so I opted to do what thumper councils us to do, "if you can't say anyfing nice, don't say noffing at all"....so I said NOTHING! Needless to say, I couldn't get the hand sanitizer on fast enough and the sacks are NOT getting emptied for at least 24 hours! Its just been that kind of a day!!!.......

NOW- I'm done crying and I'm done venting... and I am sure "the sun will come out tomorrow", things will look better and brighter and I will be okay....no worries.

41 things that contRibuTe To MY CRazY liTTle LiFE~

This week was very busy, but dull...so I don't have much to write a post about BUT...trying to keep up with my "traditional" Sunday blog update I decided to "put myself out there" a bit. I am normally a semi-private person, I don't talk about myself or like to talk about myself (because really, I am a very boring person)...but trying to get out of my shell a little I thought that I would post 41 (because yes, that's how old I am...see I am already coming out of my shell a bit) things that you may or may not know about me...I guess it all depends on how well we know each other~

1. I'm a very schedule oriented person. I make lists for everything. I have a weekly list that breaks down my days and has what I plan on doing for each day, whether its where I have to go or little things like doing laundry etc...and then I cross them off when they are completed. I love looking at the list at the end of the day/week and seeing what I've accomplished.

2. I work out every day except Sunday. I power walk on my treadmill for 50 minutes at a 7% incline. I hate every single minute of it, every single day...but I do it because I want to be healthy and I know its good for me.

3. I don't listen to the radio unless I am in the car. I like it quiet in my house when I am home. I don't turn the TV on unless I am going to sit down and watch it...which is very rarely. I just prefer to have quiet time while I go about my day.

4. Lilacs are my favorite flower...and I wished that they bloomed all summer long. I love taking pictures of nature, I love being among nature and I would live outside from May until the snow flew, if I could.

5. I collect Rooster/Chicken stuff and have more than 50 rooster/chickens...my kids keep count.

6. I love Spring and Summer, every single thing about it...and I am learning to love the beauty that Autumn has to offer (I just have a hard time enjoying Fall because I know that winter is right around the corner).

7. I suffer from seasonal depression. I've tried to conquer it, but it seems impossible.

8. I love to read. Its one of my favorite things to do when I have some "me" time....the only problem is, it makes me sleepy. I never make it through more than a few pages before

my eyes are closing...so needless to say, I don't read as much as I would like to.

9. If I were rich and could have "hired help"...I would hire a maid to put clean sheets on my bed every single day. BUT they have to be bleached and hung out on the line to dry ( I love that smell).

10. I love growing things. Gardens are my favorite because they "give back" in the fall when they produce all that yummy produce. I don't grow flowers very well... for some reason, I didn't get my mom's green thumb.

11. I've always loved being a stay-at-home mom. I never lack for things to do, in spite of what others might think....even though my kids are either gone (moved away) or in school I always have plenty to do. I don't get bored by any means!

12. I love to travel. Part of the fun in traveling is the journey getting from point A to point B. I love seeing new things, experience new things and taking tons of pictures to capture the memories.

13. I drink 5-6 quarts of water every day...yes that means LOTs of potty breaks!

14. I hate change. I really don't deal well with big, negitive changes in my life. I like my life to stay "normal" (to me)... like living in the same place, same house, same job...etc.....little changes like, hair cuts, new clothes, going out to dinner instead of staying in, new additions to the family etc...those are all okay and don't upset my life, but BIG changes are very upsetting to me.

15. I love the smell of a thunderstorm, homemade bread, babies, Spring, the mountains as the sun comes up, bacon cooking while we are camping (but only then, otherwise I don't like the smell of it), BBQing, fresh air, cut hay, cut grass, and the swimming pool water.

16. I make a 2 week menu for both breakfast and dinner. It keeps me organized and on schedule. It doesn't hurt that it saves me lots of money too.

17. I am not a very good speller. I use to be a wonderful speller when I was in high school, but as the years have gone its a skill that I have let go...thank goodness for "spell check" so that I can at least pretend to still be able to spell.

18. I have always dreamed of having a gazebo with a hanging swing in it. I would love to sit under it during the summer evenings and read a good book or watch the sun go down (or~ come up, for that matter)...I guess I will just keep dreaming.

19. I love to reminisce about all the wonderful times I had when I was a child. I love watching movies from my childhood and eating comfort food that remind me of when I was young. I didn't come from money or a family with lots of frills. We lived in the country, lived off of what we raised in our garden, fed in the fields and canned with our own hands. We had to make our own kind of fun and adventures. But I loved it, especially because I didn't know any different. I didn't know what I was missing. It was a fun little life. My mom forced me to learn to sew my own clothing. At the time, I threw every fit there was to throw, but now having that skill has been a huge benifit in my life and I am so grateful that she taught me to not only sew, but to like to sew....(I don't sew my own clothes much, except maybe a skirt here and there...but I use to sew my kids clothes when they were little)

20. I despise the dentist. At my age- I still cry when I have to go for a visit. I have to hype myself up in order to just make the appointment and make it for as far out as I can so that I can get up my nerve to go. I think it stems from a really bad experience at the dentist that I had in 4th grade. We have never had dental insurance and so going for preventive appointments have always been a "costly" matter that is never in the budget.

21. I consider myself a hard worker and I'm not afraid of hard work. I have tried to instill this in my children because I think that by being a hard worker, you can get anywhere you want to go in life.

22. On days that I don't have plans to leave the house, I shower...but I don't do my

hair (I use a hat to hide the wet mess) or put my make-up on...that way I can use the time that I would usually take to "get ready for the day" to clean or do yard work or whatever it is that I might be working on that day. So if you ever pop in on me, on one of those days, don't be surprised to see me looking a little "out of sorts".

23. I am still a kid at heart. I love to hang out with my kids at amusement parks, in the mountains, at home, anywhere....it keeps me young. I have been known to do "CRAZY" things late at night, in the car, and when there are only a few select people around. I don't know why, but my kids bring out "The Kid In ME"...and I love them for it!

24. I've always been afraid of dying...lets just say-its not at the top of my "to do list!"

25. I am addicted to Orville Redenbacher's 94% fat-free popcorn and I eat it every single day!

26. I am not a fan of red meat. I don't hate it, and it certainly doesn't bother me that other people love it, and I even eat it sometimes...but its just not something that I eat (or like to eat) on a daily basis...now put me in front of a seafood buffet and I could eat it all day...I know, go figure, you would think that meat was meat, BUT alas, its NOT.

27. I love bread, its one of my favorite foods in the world...BUT I don't eat it often because I have a hard time not eating a ton of it. I guess you could call me a "recovering Breadaholic" and I know my limits so I steer clear of it...most days. I have to "fall off the wagon" sometimes but I limit those times to~ few and far between.

28. I've always wanted to have a gym membership. I think that going everyday with people that are working toward the same thing, would be great motivation for me.....but since we don't have one within a 5 minute radius (rural living has its disadvantages), I opt to do it alone and its not near as much fun as I think it COULD be!

29. I like to people watch (not in a perverse way). I wonder what their lives are all about. What they do for fun, what their trials in life might be, where they have been and what they've overcome. I wonder what brought them to that point in their lives and where they might be going from there....its just a weird thing that I do...but its interesting none the less.

30. I hate being in a bathing suit. I've NEVER in my life been confident in being seen by anyone, anywhere at anytime in swim wear. IF by chance that you have been somewhere and seen me in a swimsuit, just know that it took DAYs if not WEEKS to hype myself up into going there in that skimpy attire....maybe it stems from me having a poor body image my entire life.

31. I like to cook, but don't like the clean up. I like trying new recipes and then blogging about them. I made a recipe book for all of my children. It has the recipes in it of the foods that they grew up with, their favorites and even some of their "NOT so Favorites". (It has recipes that the 3 older kids grew up on, the 3 younger ones haven't grown up yet) and I am working on volume 2...(this one will have the recipes that the 3 younger kids ate alot of, loved and even hated...but I made anyway.)

32. I have a "Bucket List" and I am actually working on accomplishing the things that are on it...I don't want the things that I wrote to be in vain, I really plan on making things happen.

33. I color code my clothes in my closet and I am a little OCD about it. I know, I shouldn't stress about such things, but we all have our little nitches don't we?!...and that's ONE of mine.

34. I'm scared of wood ticks and skunks...they absolutely freak me out.

35. I have a huge dent in my head that would look like I was beat with a baseball bat if you could see my scalp...here's praying that I never have to have chemotherapy and lose my hair.

36. I have many pet peeves (don't we all?), some of which I won't divulge here...but some of them are laziness (especially if it directly affects me), dishonesty in any shape or form, dirty dishes in my kitchen when I get home from anywhere (especially if the kitchen was clean when I left), those who are in a hurry and cut in front of me on the road when there isn't any reason to, gum in my dryer, an un-made bed and when people say mean things to others and then say, "Just kidding!" (like that's going to take all the hurt away and as if that hurt person isn't going to analyze the mean comment later, words always hurt...been there)

37. I don't like to talk/discuss or be in a room where others are talking/discussing anything to do with politics, especially with friends and family. I think that every person has the right to chose what political party they choose to affiliate with and support that party. Because I believe one way, doesn't make it the one and only or correct way. And just because I believe something doesn't mean that someone else can't believe another. Political conversations aren't meant for group settings with those you love....in my experience it only causes feelings of hurt and anger....SO "If you can't say anything nice, don't say noffing at all" ~Thumper (from Bambi)

38. I always wished that I was musically talented, (like played the piano or the Cello or the harp)....but not enough to do anything about it.

39. I am a big fan of Oil of Olay anti-wrinkle cream. I think it works wonders on my face and I hope they never stop making it.

40. Three things that I couldn't live without (besides the obvious, like my hubby and my children and family, money, shelter, food and water etc...)~ 1. clothes....they hide so many of my physical flaws 2. My toothbrush...it makes the world a happier place to be when we all brush our teeth 3. My stove...I don't ever want to go back to cooking over a fire like the pioneers had to do...I'm a big fan of Modern DAY conveniences!

41.....last but not least~ this one's for you KIM (because I told her to ask me a question that she didn't know about me, but wanted to know)

If I could have any job (and she said being a mom doesn't count as an answer) in the world, what would it be....I have many that I would love, being a pediatrician would be great. I love kids, medicine intrigues me, I love learning and helping others and I would love that job...plus the mullah wouldn't be so bad either. When I was young (high school) I always thought that I would love to be a high school teacher or a marriage councilor or even a beautician.....but being a wife and mom was always my biggest dream job....so here I am, living out my dream.

There you have it...41 things that make me..."ME". As crazy, unique, strange and even lame as it all might seem, those 41 things are part of what makes me who I am.

Zoo-pendous!

With summer coming to a close I am trying to fit in as much as I can before the snow falls. We were planning on taking a day trip out to Timanogos Cave last weekend...BUT alas, I called to make reservations for the cave tour and they tell me that its "FREE DAY" and all the tickets are gone unless I want to come out and stand in line at 7:30 AM and hope for a ticket before the sun sets!...so that idea was quickly scratched! Todd came up with the idea of going to the Zoo. None of us had been this year. (I hadn't been in several years)...so it sounded like a good plan. Deron, Cameron and Jack all had tickets to the BYU football game with Grandpa so they weren't going to be able to come to the zoo with us. Erik opted not to come...so that left me, all the girls and Todd. We weren't going to let anything stop us from having a great day....so we ventured out the door Saturday morning and planned on having a ton of fun. (We hoped for good weather too) After several hours of traveling, we turned off of Foothill Drive, having made pretty good time...and only having another 5 minutes to drive, when we came to a pretty good HALT! Traffic was stopped...we waited and waited for things to start moving, but it only crept at a snails pace. We waited for 90 minutes just to get TO THE PARKING LOT turn to get into the zoo. Now, any SANE person would have bagged the entire zoo experience about then and turned around and headed back home, but after driving for 2 hours and being totally INSANE...we WERE going to tough it out. Dayna, Todd and Dana jumped out of the car (when we were in front of the parking lot turn off) and went to get in the enormous line for tickets, while I wandered around trying to find a parking spot....which wasn't easy I might add. We ended up parking way up above the zoo in front of a gated community and then hiking back down into the zoo. Once we got into the zoo it was all worth it, but I was starting to wonder if we should just find something else to do, but I am glad that we stuck with our plan. Later we found out that the Zoo was hosting a Diabetes Walk ...hence all of the traffic to get into the zoo...(we decided next time we go, we will check the Internet and see when they have things going on out there and NOT go that weekend). We got to see the new baby elephant, talk about cute! I didn't expect her to be quite so small. She had quite a vibrant personality too and played with the crowd, rolling on the ground and trotting around the pen. There were baby merkats, tigers and a baby giraffe. Lots of cute animals. the penguins were swimming, the bear were playing and the roosters were wandering. We spent about 2-3 hours walking around looking at all of the animals. It had been such a long time since we had been that we all just took our time, took alot of pictures, talked and relaxed. We rode the little train and reminisced about when we use to all come to the zoo when the kids were all small. After our fun filled afternoon we went and ate our picnic lunch up on top of the mountain by where I had to park. There was a little park with a nice picnic table and we were starving, so that's where dinner was served. We had a great time relaxing and enjoying the wonderful weather. Who says that you can't have fun at the zoo without little kids...we DID!

Oh... the BEAUTY of it ALL!

There is proof that Autumn is officially here. We went to Hogle Zoo yesterday and we drove through all of the canyons (Daniels, Parley's and everything in between)....the colors were vibrant and just gorgeous.... (Although~ I had gone out to the city the day before and the colors seemed to be even more stunning then.) I just love seeing the reds and the oranges cover the mountain sides. It makes it really hard for me to drive down the road because I just want to sit and look at the leaves, the mountains and along the roadside. I love how the reds pop against the greens and yellows....its just so pretty. On the way home from the zoo we stopped at Whisky Springs so that I could hike up the trail and get some closer pictures of the foliage...but a picture doesn't do it justice, it was so much prettier in real life. I could just live outside from April until it snowed...I love the colors of Spring, Summer and Autumn. I love the sound of the running rivers, the chirping of the birds and the smell of campfire (as long as its not on me). I love the squirrels, the prairie dogs, the deer (not on the road) and the butterflies. I love everything that nature has to offer during the 3 seasons of Glory. Although I am not looking forward to the coming months of Winter, (you all know that that is an understatement and then some) I am trying to look past whats coming and enjoy the Fall and all of the changes that come with it. Its gorgeous out there....so go out and have a look for yourselves!

A Betty Crocker moment for me....

Many of you out there that are reading this- already have this recipe... BUT...some of you don't. Every time I've made this salad I've been asked for the recipe and it quickly became one of OUR favorite salad recipes years ago when I made it up. Our family loves it and we eat it all summer long. Sorry there aren't any pictures...but just imagine it looking SCRUMPTIOUS----because it really is!

Julie's Bacon Macaroni Salad

2 boxes of bow tie pasta (any other noodle can be used, I personally like the bow tie or elbow macaroni noodles)

2 lbs. bacon, cut into small pieces and cooked until crisp but not burnt

4-5 tomato's, diced

2-3 c. grated Cheddar cheese (more or less depending on your taste)

Mayonnaise (has to be MAYONNAISE not salad dressing or Miracle Whip)

1/4 c. Ranch dressing from the bottle (more or less to taste)

salt

pepper

season salt

Cook noodles as directed on the package. Drain and cool completely. Cook bacon and let it cool also. Combine noodles, bacon, cheese, and tomato's, mix well. Add desired amount of Mayonnaise, 1/4 c. Ranch dressing, and salt and pepper and seasoning salt to taste. Serve immediately. Refrigerate leftovers.

* I don't love bacon so if I am making it for me (a very small bowl) I leave out the bacon. I have kids that don't love tomato's and I've tried to leave them out, but the taste is completely altered. It tastes the best with EVERYTHING in it.

*If you are going to be taking this to a dinner or aren't going to be able to eat it right away, mix everything but the Mayonnaise and Ranch Dressing together and add those right before serving.

*When eating leftovers, sometimes the noodles absorb the Mayonnaise and it become dry- just add more Mayonnaise and a little milk and it creams it right up.

Sugar and SpiCe and EVERYthIng NICE...thats what little girls are made of!

It only happens once a year...but I am already wishing we could do it again before next year...It's our annual "Girls Weekend!" We started this wonderful tradition last year in July, just before Todd and Dana were married. We vowed to keep it a tradition and and made plans for the event to take place again...which it did this past weekend. Last year we sort of did the "SPA THING", with facials, painting toenails and a "get to know you game"...this year we took on the theme of "GAME TIME". We ate at the Chinese Gourmet in Orem until we were ALMOST too full (we had to save room for our "junk food" later on). Afterwards we tried something new and did a Photo Scavenger Hunt...which turned out to be a blast! We had a list of 60 things (that were each worth a different amount of points) on our lists. We had to take a picture of one of our team mates with the object from our list. We had 1 1/2 hours to get as many photo's as possible and the team with the most points won. Poor Kim had to be on my team...(she felt sad that she had to be on my team too because she knew that I would be the loser)...I was the slow one, so yes Dayna and Dana won...but Kim was a good sport and we had tons of fun. We took pictures of strangers, candy, something that reminded us of summer, the inside of a restaurant, a fire hydrant, someone working and many, many more hilarious and crazy things. We really had to think "out of the box" on some of the objects and be super creative. It was hysterical to see some of the pictures that everyone took...good laughs for years to come thats for sure. Dayna and Dana won cute purses for getting the most points! We then went back to Dayna and Jack's where we were spending the night. We made junk food and played more hilarious games. We played one where we passed the camera around (that was set on the timer mode), whoever got stuck with the camera when it went off had to pick some outrageous item from a bag of "unknown" objects!...we wore masks, crazy hats, wigs, moo moo's...crazy garb that none of us would be caught dead in. It was great for laughs and many fun pictures. At about 1:30am, we couldn't hold our eyes open any longer and we headed for bed. BUT...bright and early (7:30 am) I got up, made crepes with raspberry freezer jam, frozen strawberries, Nutella and banana's and whipped topping...yes we ate AGAIN...can you believe it!

Then we got ready and headed out for a day of shopping. We found some great deals on winter wear...shoes and "girl stuff"...we bought a few fun things and then we all went and had our nails done! I'm not one to get my nails done often (this is only the 3rd time in my LIFE) because I don't feel like its a luxury that I can do all the time...BUT I have to say~ it sure makes me feel pampered and pretty when I do. I love the way my hands actually look like "girl hands" and the way that it makes me feel a little more feminine with long nails. We had a fantastic time just "being girls" together. Talking, laughing and goofing off couldn't have been any more fun! I love my girls! Girls weekend is something that I look forward to every year. I can't wait until next year when we can do it again.

PS...Halle gets to start going to our "Girls Weekend" in a few years, that's why there aren't any pictures of her in here...but we love her and are excited for when she will be grown up enough to come along.

Monday Maddness...?!

...And LAST but not LEAST, our final day of Labor day! We ALL...yes that was "EVERYONE"...agreed that we should go hiking up Rock Creek. We packed a lunch...city style (went to Subway and got sandwiches), threw it all in our packs and headed up the canyon for the day. We got up there and it was just beautiful. Everything was still green and gorgeous. Some of the leaves were changing, but not many. I was a little surprised that we didn't see more people on the trail...being a holiday and all. We passed 2 people on horses going up past the dam and there were 4 people behind us...just going to see the dam. We hiked in about 2-2 1/2 miles, ate our lunch along the trail, took lots of pictures and enjoyed the gorgeous mountains. I had forgotten how rocky the trail was...hence the name "ROCK CREEK", but I'm a little slow...if I was going to pick my favorite trail that we've gone on this year, it would be the one up Moon Lake, hands down. Its got the incline and decline along with the smooth, straight way... but the path isn't rocky and we could enjoy the view around us without having to STOP to LOOK at our view like we did on the Rock Creek Trail. We had to keep our eyes down most of the time because the rocks are so thick and none of us wanted to trip. Cameron found some wild raspberries and even ate a few of them. We decided that the ones at home were much sweeter and alot BIGGER! The ferns were still out and in areas of the trail they were just thick and lush! I've never seen ferns all over like I have this year, they are beautiful. It makes me sad when I think that before too long all the plants and the pretty colors are going to be gone and everything will be blanketed with that YUCKY white stuff!...I am soaking in all the nature and warmth and sunshine that I can get...hopefully storing up enough to get me through the winter. Our day was splendid even though there was a "LITTLE" complaining and some tired bodies, we are still hoping to get in a couple of more hikes before the snow flies..maybe even one up to Timp Cave!....We're on a roll now, why stop?!